Buffy The Vampire Slayer faces off against the terror of Ted in today’s SPOILER filled installment of My Year of Buffy.
What Buffy Did!
The Scoobies are having a boring night when they are startled by what they see at Buffy’s house. Her mother kissing a man in the kitchen. Turns out her mom has been secretly dating Ted for awhile now and was waiting for the right time to tell Buffy. Ted is a great chef and a charming fellow, but Buffy still does not like the man. Buffy takes her pissiness out on a Vampire, which causes Giles concern and they talk for abit. Buffy seeks solace from Angel, who tells her to give Ted a chance. At a mini-golf outing, Ted acts too much like a man in charge, and when her catches Buffy cheating, he reveals a hidden anger and controlling nature. Ted switches back instantly to normal when everyone else shows up. Buffy’s mom does not believe her daughters warning about Ted, which causes the Slayer to get the Scoobies to investigate the man. Buffy stalks Ted at work and finds out he is planning on getting engaged. Later Buffy, her mom, and Ted argue at the dinner table, and Buffy takes off to go on patrol. When she returns, Ted is in her room, going through her things and threatens Buffy. They argue, then fight, with Buffy using her Slayer powers and skills to beat Ted up and accidentally kill him. When the police arrive, her mom lies, but Buffy tells the truth. The police have trouble believing Buffy’s story, all because of her Slayer healing ability/invulnerability. Buffy feels massive guilt and the Scoobies find out Ted’s food is drugged and that he has had multiple wives since 1957. Giles goes on patrol that night and Miss Calendar shows up to help, but accidentally arrows him. Buffy is suddenly confronted by Ted in her room, alive. They fight and Buffy finds out that Ted is really a robot, who knocks her out. Ted goes after Buffy’s mom and is damaged. The Scoobies find Ted’s lair, which is 1950’s like, complete with dead wives. Buffy fights Ted and defeats him. Buffy is cleared of all charges and we are told the real Ted’s wife left him, so he made a robot which kept wanting to replace the wife. The Scoobies almost walk in on Giles and Miss Calendar kissing in the library.
You always know the Scoobies coming home all happy and stuff is the calm before the storm. And the storm is Buffy finding her mom macking on some guy in the kitchen. And it’s John Ritter! I had heard he guested for awhile. He plays Ted, her mom’s hidden boyfriend and I can small crazy bad guy on him from a mile away. Willow’s squeal is priceless. Ted is waaaay smooth, which makes my spidey-sense tingle even more! That poor Vampire, didn’t see a pissed Buffy coming. Poor Giles, clueless to human emotions. Xander is quoting Freud? Ted is so supernice and helpful and obviously evil. Still rooting for Giles and Miss Calendar. Oh no, Angel is being tortured! By Buffy babbling about Ted! Okay, is Ted a demon or an abusive human? Paging reality for Buffy’s mom. Ted working in a computer sales center always feels… evil, and I don’t know why. Thank the Watcher for helpful babblemouths at work, telling Buffy all sorts of nice bits of info. Dinner. Tension. And Ted is a jerk. Ted is really creepy and really evil and really creepy. Ted goes through her room! What a psycho! Fight! I hope Buffy kills him! And she does! Buffy’s mom lies to the cops! Buffy tells the truth. And being a Slayer and not bruising easily does not help with the cops. A guilty Buffy is a sad Buffy. Cordelia is so good at pep talks – not. I had a feeling the food he was continually offering was spiked. Willow looks like such a happy puppy when Xander compliments her. Buffy’s window nailed shut was creepy and scary. Ted! I jumped and screamed! Giles and Miss Calendar versus a Vampire! And they make up. Buffy and Ted fight and the jerk is a robot! Okay, that was different. The Scoobies start figuring out Ted’s secrets, which include four wives going back to the 1950’s. And one very creepy apartment. Ted is smooth. Ted is nuts. Ted is obsessed. And Buffy’s mom does a Smallville and is conveniently knocked unconscious. And Buffy wins!
Buffy babbles and rants about Ted to Giles, who thinks they are talking about Vampires, but the Watcher realizes he is wrong with this line, “Buffy, I believe the subtext here is rapidly becoming text.” And Xander says what would seem obvious in Sunnydale, that Ted is Hellmouth related, with this line, “We are talking creature feature here right?” And Xander gets Willow’s hopes up with a compliment, than quickly tries explaining it away with, “That’s the cookies talking. You rock!”
I can’t help but wonder if Ted was really always meant to be human, not an old evil robot. The fact that Ted speaks, acts and threatens just like a real abusive man would makes him a true monster. And when Ted and Buffy fight, I wanted her to rip his beeping head off.
Ted is a truly frightening episode.
…is currently reading Schultz and Peanuts by David Michaelis