The whole world changes on Buffy The Vampire Slayer as Cordelia makes a wish in The Wish. Another installment of my SPOILER filled My Year of Buffy!
What Buffy Did!
The couples Willow/Oz and Xander/Cordelia are still split up. Cordelia’s old friends taunt her for having Xander cheat on her. That night outside the Bronze, Buffy tries to talk to Cordelia, but accidentally knocks her into the trash while fighting a Vampire, further humiliating Cordelia. At school the next day, Cordelia decides Buffy is to blame for her troubles, and at the prompting of new girl Anya, makes the wish that the Slayer had never come to Sunnydale. Anya, who gave Cordelia a necklace earlier, changes into a demon, causes a reality whammy that changes everything into a non Buffy Sunnydale. Cordelia recalls the old reality, but is now happy with this turn of events. This world is dour and sad and has memorials all the time for deceased students has Vampires overrunning Sunnydale, all led by the Master. And Cordelia finds out Willow and Xander are dead. When she meets them, alone in the dark streets, she realizes they are now Vampires. The White Hats show up and save Cordelia, and that group is made up of Giles, Oz, Larry the bully who is secretly gay, and some girl. Cordelia starts to tell Giles about this reality is all wrong and that Buffy should be here to save the day. But Willow and Xander show up and kill Cordelia. The Master is happy and lets Willow play with the puppy, which we find out is Angel, who Willow happily tortures. Giles calls Buffy’s Watcher in Cleveland, and gets the cold stake in reply. Giles figures out the necklace Cordelia was wearing is from Anyanka, a demon of vengeance and wronged woman. He also learns if it destroyed, Anya’s power goes. The Master has made a factory for quicker extraction of human blood and shows it off to hordes of Vampires. Giles, while driving along, saves a bunch of humans from Vampires, and is in turn saved by Buffy, who is all business. Buffy does not believe or care about Anya’s spell and goes to stop the Master. Buffy finds Angel, realizes he is a Vampire, but decides to work with him anyway. As the Master starts the plant, Buffy and Angel and Oz and Larry attack and start freeing the prisoners. Xander kills Angel and Buffy kills Xander and Oz kills Willow and the Master kills Buffy. Giles conjures up Anya and demands she fix reality, and she tells him to bugger off. Giles then smashes the necklace in order to reverse the wish, which it does. Suddenly we are right back at when Cordelia made her original wish, and Anya looks confused when nothing happens.
Buffy versus a demon with Xander knocked out and Willow looking for a nerf. Typical day, in other words. Faith a no show? Willow and Xander seeking relationship advice from Buffy? Desperate times! Cordelia is going really dark with this picture cutting, than burning, and looking all devastated. Willow stalking Oz locker is sad. That Cordelia confidence walk disappears when she sees her old friends. Anya. Does she become a regular? She sounds familiar. Xander’s last name is Harris. And Cordelia’s old friends are bitches. Willow and Oz finally are face to face and this hurts to watch. Plot point! Anya necklace. Willow cuts off jerk Xander from getting too touchy. Buffy seems remarkably non judgmental of Willow and Xander behaviour. Wasn’t some of them ripping into her recently over Angel? Where is Giles in all this? Cordelia blames Buffy plus stomach pains plus Anya necklace equals Anya becoming a demon. I thought Anya sang that bunnies song in Once More With Feeling. Now Buffy never came to Sunnydale! Saw microphone at 17.20! Monthly memorial? Curfew? Willow and Xander dead? I think we all kinda saw this coming. Xander is a Vampire! Willow is a Vampire! Giles saves the day! Oz and Larry and others are Scoobies! Bronze is a Vampire hangout! The Master! The Plant? Giles knows something is up because his is Giles. Cordelia being fed upon by Willow and Xander was not what I was expecting. And Giles is properly horrified. So the Vampires in Buffy don’t sleep in coffins during the day? Puppy is a person? Angel??? Giles saves some people and Buffy saves Giles. And she is full of attitude. Buffy meet Giles and they don’t get along. Buffy meet Angel. And Angel knows Buffy, which is a great callback. This Buffy would stake Angel in a heartbeat. But the evidence of torture changes her mind? Joss has a thing for torture I noticed. Okay this factory device is disgusting. Fight! Buffy versus Willow! Angel got staked! Buffy stakes Xander! Oz staked Willow! This is every Buffy’s fans nightmare! Master kills Buffy! Giles smashes necklace and the world is saved!
Buffy has to explain to Xander how silly he sounds to flip the blame onto Cordelia, “Your logic does not resemble our earth logic.” Anya explains it all to Cordelia about Harmony with this, “If that girl had an original thought her head would explode.” Cordelia asks a delicate question to Vampire Willow and Vampire Xander, “What’s up with you two and the leather?” Vampire Willow asks the Master for a favour, and in a very creepy way, “Can I play with the puppy?” Giles has the best conversation with Buffy’s Watcher, “Yes, I am aware that their is a great deal of demonic activity in Cleveland.” Vampire Willow tells Angel what she is gonna do, again in a creepy way, “That’s right puppy, Willow is gonna make you bark.” Buffy asks the question I have asked as well, when she finds out Giles knows where the Vampires are, “You know where he lives and no one has tried to take him out?”
I think this is Joss telling the fans that things could be worse after last episode. Much worse. Much much worse. So be happy that everyone is not dead or Vampires or in the plant! Thanks Joss, now just get all the couples back together. Pretty please?
…is currently reading Fables v. 17 Inherit the Wind by Bill Willingham and Cinderella: From Fabletown With Love by Chris Roberson.