Not actually Scoop, and not actually Scoop’s books.
What I read all the time is half planned, half dice role, and half by accident.
So yeah, it is all over the place.
Sometimes I do try to group things, like a few years ago when I read all those Star Trek actors biographies, and sometimes the grouping happens by happenstance, like when I irregularly read a bunch of books that featured nature as a major theme.
Several years back I consumed some Judy Blume classics by plan, and made a vow to someday continue with the rest of her greatness. So my To Be Read list got longer.
Flash forward to fall 2022 and the book banning whackos were everywhere. Several people decided to support these titles by reading them, and I joined their ranks.
So I got from the Toronto Library a banned book I had heard of, but never read, namely Roll Of Thunder, Hear My Cry by Mildred D. Taylor. And being a completest, I looked up the rest of her work and saw everything was one big saga of stories. So I added all of them to my To Be Read list.
At this point my ever evolving To Be Read had evolved again with all these titles, and a realization had dawned on me. Between the Judy Blume’s already on my list, and the Mildred Taylor’s now added, and certain other titles also already living their, my Spidey-sense went off.
I had a ton of books written by women.
Some I already had, some were only available from the library, and one I might have to purchase, but they were all planned out in front of me.
But my massive guestimate, based on advanced mathematics and powerful algorithms, I would be finished Mildred Taylor’s series by March-ish 2023, which means I then launch into the world’s of Judy Blume. Until I decide to change the order, something I tend to do all the time. Which is why I planned to finish off some series by Lesley Livingston, the Canadian writer and really nice person, before Blume restarted. Another series on my list, one that a neighbourhood kid, midway through the year, recommended. They moved up to fill a lag in Judy Blume from the library, which is how Ramona entered my life. Then another banned book moved up as well, which allowed me to catch Harriet. Which brings up the Little Free Libraries. One gave me a Booky Trilogy that was literally my next read, and years back a different one gave me a history book about the Gutenberg Bible, which became my change of pace. The planned grand finale for 2023 going into 2024 was going to be Lauren Beukes, whom I have already read with the excellent Shining Girls.
Whew! So half planned, half spontaneous, half luck.
But I did it.
Mildred Taylor to Lesley Livingston to Judy Blume to Beverly Cleary to Louis Fitzhugh to Bernice Thurman Hunter to Margaret Leslie Davis to Lauren Beukes.
Two unexpected challenges arose from this idea.
One was a I had not bought a book in several years, mainly because I wanted to get through the ones I had. So one Jody Blume book had to be gotten through a used site.
Two was I had developed the habit of putting a song onto my Instagram Stories when I announced to the world every week my #fridayreads. Because I was reading groupings of books together, I decided the songs should have themes as well. Mildred Taylor led to 1930s singer Paul Robeson, Lesley Livingston led to mostly Simon and Garfunkel, Judy Blume led to mostly 1980s female pop singers, Beverly Cleary led to Paula Abdul, Louis Fitzhugh led to Alanis Morissette, Bernice Thurman Hunter led to The Beatles, Margaret Leslie Davis led to Star Trek Enterprise theme song, and Lauren Beukes led to, well, Alanis Morissette. A book about a ten year old writer and several sci-fi thrillers makes me think of Alanis. Interesting.
As for how long I will continue reading just women authors, that is a good question. I have several more lined up, and, as usual, a surprise. You will just have to read and see.
Scoopriches
… is reading Zoo City by Lauren Beukes on my Kindle.
Being a lifelong Doctor Who fan, and having seen craptons of it, and being online alot, means I am eminently qualified to give you an early Christmas gift and offer my completely unsolicited thoughts on the legendary sci-fi classic.
Now, for the sake of clarity, I am babbling about some of the current revelations about the good Doctor that have shook fandoms. The stuff the haters hate just because they are haters.
Over the sixty years Doctor Who has been around, mostly as a television show but also as comics, books, and audio books. Which means a show about a space faring time travelling alien and their various companions saving the day will constantly change and evolve and conflict with itself.
Heck, it took like a decade before they named the Doctor’s home planet as Gallifrey, and Regeneration, where the mortally wounded Doctor heals and comes back as a new actor, has morphed all over the place.
So a few years back, they revealed over several episodes new wrinkles to the Doctor’s origin and life, which had massive implications to, well, everything.
Basically, why the Doctor left Gallifrey and became a fugitive and started interfering in time, was never really explained. At one point the Doctor was caught and the Time Lords wiped parts of his mind and forced a Regeneration onto him and exiled him to Earth.
In “Fugitive Of The Judoon” the Doctor meets another Doctor, but not from her future, but from her past, but she has no memory of this Doctor. Which means this new Doctor is pre the first Doctor, who has long been acknowledged to be the first Doctor. And shortly after, in “The Timeless Child” we see the Doctor may not be from Gallifrey, but from some unknown place, and it is implied the Time Lords wiped her memory. And by the way, it has long been established that the Doctor picked the name the Doctor with the first Doctor.
So with all these puzzle pieces, I threw together my own theory. And since my track record with my predictions sucks more then a black hole, we can guarantee the show will come up with waaaaaay better ideas.
The Doctor came from somewhere and somewhen else, falling through that hole in the sky on that unnamed planet. The Doctor grew up and regenerated and helped build Gallifrey into Time Lords with controlled Regenerations. And the Doctor becomes some kind of agent for the Time Lords, doing good deeds throughout the universe.
Three of The Doctors teaming up to save the day.
On a mission she is codenamed The Doctor but finds out the Time Lords are actually up to no good, so she hides her Tardis, transforms to human, and hides on Earth. Then she meets her future self, changes back to Time Lord, and takes off on the run again.
But eventually she is caught and the Time Lords do a complete memory wipe and forced Regenation, this time making the Doctor into a young boy. This was shown as possible years ago with River Song. Given a new name and family, but not told he was adopted, he had trouble fitting into this new life. Part of this was shown in “Listen.”
While growing up, he aimed to go to the Time Lord Academy, but had trouble getting in and passing. Eventually he became a top student, graduated, worked for the Time Lords and moved his up in the government, and along the way got married and had kids and grandkids.
Sometime after all this, something happened to his family, and it appears all that was left was Susan, the teen granddaughter. Something snapped. Rebelling against the system he had always lived and worked in, he and Susan flee Gallifrey, stealing an old type 40 Tardis that belonged in a museum that was the same one he had used before, and going on adventures.
And he starts calling himself The Doctor.
Now, if you are the High Council of Gallifrey and this person you mind wiped gets back to being a Time Lord and steals his old Tardis and starts helping people again AND starts calling himself by her old name, would you not immediately panic and wonder what else they are remembering?
The Doctor now wanders time and space, picking up companions here and their, and saving the day. He does not trust the Time Lord’s, but does he even fully understand why himself? And his constant travels, it’s like he is looking for something someplace somewhere. Maybe where he came from? It is deep inside the Doctor a feeling that even they are not aware of.
Of not belonging.
Of being betrayed.
Of needing help.
So the Doctor fosters fellowship and trust and security with all who come into his/her life.
It is a great mission for the eternal traveler and a wonderful message for the eager audience.
The issues these changes make are excellent jumping on points for discussions on immigration, adoption, relationships with parents, trust in authority figures, accountability in government, and friendship.
All of these are wonderful concepts for Doctor Who to explore, because after 60 years, the good Doctor is only just getting started learning about the human condition.
Scoopriches
… is reading Moxyland by Lauren Beukes on my Kindle.
Sccop on the left, Giffen on the right. Just to be clear.
Yet again I have to write about another comics legend being no longer with us.
RIP Keith Giffen, you magnificent bastard.
And Keith, being the grumpy grumpy that he was, would have loved being described that way.
He started as an artist back in the 1970s working at both DC and Marvel Comics, but arguably never made much of a mark. Then, in 1982, he joined up with writer Paul Levitz on The Legion Of Super Heroes, DC’s futuristic teen heroes who had been around for decades. Chaos (Giffen) met Order (Levitz) and magic was created. Also at this time, he co-created Ambush Bug, which was Deadpool before Deadpool and a waaaaay better Deadpool. His star kept rising, leading to the new Justice League, coming back to Legion, taking over Legion, doing a million other things for DC, Marvel, and independent publishers, and became the fifth writer (their term, not his) on the 52 weekly comic. Those Guardians of the Galaxy movies so many love? So much was based on his work. Rocket Raccoon? He co-created him back in the 1970s. Many of his collaborators describe him as a fake grumpy guy who cared, a dedicated worker, and an idea generator.
My introduction to Keith was with Legion the first time around, and I was mesmerized. I had the amazing opportunity to finally meet him in 2008 at Fan Expo. He was every bit as nice, grumpy, funny, and honest as I had heard.
To celebrate his great legacy, I am taking a journey through some of my favourite works of his..
The epic conclusion to The Great Darkness Saga. Art by Giffen.
THE LEGION OF SUPERHEROES
Keith came onto this comic like a man on fire, wanting to prove he could do the work and make it great. He refined the look of the Legion and the 30th century universe they inhabit. Levitz was already planning the amazing Great Darkness Saga when Giffen came on, and the pair just clicked. The amazing first Legion Annual, the epic Great Darkness, the emotional issue 300, his art style change that was rough, the new Legion issue 1 with the Legion War (and brutally killing off Karate Kid, a character he absolutely loathed) was all part of his first run. Years later, he came back for awhile, then when Levitz left, Giffen stepped up even more.
The Earth blows up in this intense tale. Art by Giffen.
THE LEGION OF SUPERHEROES AGAIN
Giffen relaunches the iconic Legion in 1989 with another issue 1, and this time working with writers Tom and Mary Bierbaum. And just to make things different, he decides to jump everything ahead 5 Years Later, the Legion has disbanded, the United Planets has diminished, and Earth has been secretly dominated by aliens. To tell this massive tale, heavily culminating in the Terra Mosaic storyline, Giffen experimented with format and structure, sometimes using journal entries and news reports and such to fill in the five year gap, and pushed story boundaries with PTSD and LGBTQ and identity issues, among others. Pissed at DC, he left the comic with the masterpiece issue 38, where the Earth, freshly liberated from alien occupation, was destroyed. It was an emotional gutpunch that still hits hard to this day.
The NEW Justice League, called the BWAHAHA era. Art by Kevin Maguire.
JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL
Between his two Legion runs, Giffen got ahold of DC’s flagship title, Justice League. It had just been through some rough years with most of the heroes leaving replaced with new ones and a move to Detroit of all places, and then being shattered by a massacre. This leads to a new team being formed during the Legends crossover being a motley group of characters from all over DC. Captain Marvel, Blue Beetle, Black Canary, Martian Manhunter, Batman, and Green Lantern Guy Gardner were just some parts of this team that clashed with bad guys and each other. Issue four had the infamous Batman vs Guy fight that was short and funny and so in character. Which was one of the hallmarks at first in this comic, Giffen and writer J.M. DeMatteis putting the characters up against each other. But after issue seven, when the team gets a new United Nations Charter and becomes Justice League International, they really up the humour, which made it more hit and miss for me.
A Christmas gift from my older brother. Many thanks.
AMBUSH BUG!!!!
During this creative explosion in the 1980s, Keith co-created Ambush Bug as a villain in a Superman comic. He was kinda loopy, so he was brought back again and again, figured out Clark Kent was Superman, then promptly exited the DC Universe. At this point he knew he was a comics character, and bounced around DC in two miniseries and a Christmas Special (which my older brother got me for xmas, many thanks!) all mocking the industry. A flashdance joke (timely!) and a Secret Wars joke (really timely!!). Cheeks his Cabbage Patch Kid sidekick who died heroically (still sad) and the evil God Darkseid showing up everywhere to fight Bug (or not). Getting defeated by the Legion of Substitute Heroes (yes, you read that right) and meeting Jonni DC (who “polices” DC continuity). These are simply a fraction of the wild humour and offbeat stuff that Giffen jammed into every Ambush Bug story. And sometimes I use the term “story” loosely.
The final issue of the amazing 52 weekly comic. Art by J.G. Jones.
52
Back in 2006, DC was finishing off its massive Infinite Crisis universe redefining crossover event, and to end it they did a famous One Year Later time jump. But what happened during that year? A year where Superman, Wonder Woman and Batman were off the board? DC got four writers together onto a weekly comic called 52 that dealt with each week during that time and focused on multiple characters such as Steel and Booster Gold and Elongated Man. Giffen was brought on as an idea generator and layout artist, since Levitz, who was now DC President and Publisher, thought Keith was the best person to build this new universe they were reshaping. The other writers declared Giffen the fifth writer, which he disagreed with, and he considered his main job was to get the book out on time. Which he did. And an excellent read he helped create as well.
Keith Giffen probably would have hated this post, thinking I am just regurgitating his greatest hits. And he would be right. But all this work, all this creative greatness, made excellent stories that stand the test of time.
Scoopriches
… is reading Letters To Judy: What Your Kids Wish They Could Tell You by Judy Blume.
Ah, being a Geek is a hard lot in life, always has been with new comics and books and shows and movies coming out and old comics and books and shows and movies being newly discovered by new fans. It was a constant never-ending struggle to keep up the today and the history.
Then Hollywood refound us and the Geek stuff, well, exploded. Fifty two thousand shows and movies, and you get the idea, exploded over the past decade or so, and the comics universes themselves getting rebooted over and over.
Which means catching up on EVERYTHING Geek is a big fun job, and that’s even if you only include the shows and movies.
So yes, this is my very long-winded way of babbling on about stuff I have seen lately.
BLACK ADAM
This long awaited addition to the DC movieverse was hated by critics and was a box office disappointment. So the newest DC movie regime gave up on it and went in yet another direction again.
Which is a massive shame, since this is a great movie, with interesting themes, amazing action, lots of twists, and a fascinating exploration of even more corners of the DC Universe.
Not wanting to spoil anything, but whatever negativity you heard about this movie when it came out is complete and utter bullcrap, which is par for the course for a DC movie. What some went on what Black Adam is about, that the Justice Society was only sent in because Adam was disrupting the occupying force of Intergang. In other words, a real world look at the USA defending its terrorist allies. But that is clearly shown to not be the case, and a bigger picture is glimpsed at. Which reveals the real plot of this film, and goes into the larger themes of power and rage and revenge. While all is not resolved by the end, there is plenty of fodder for sequels to explore this and the variations thereof.
Plus, Black Adam introduces supporting characters who are all set to become heroes themselves, with the mother and son all ready to take on roles we know and love. And while some questioned the existence of the Justice Society of America in the movie, it is explained enough the who and the what and the why of them. Dr Fate is perfect as a tired jaded old warrior and Hawkman feels just like so many versions put together, which pretty much describes this messed up character. The newer heroes are Cyclone, whom I have virtually no experience with but seems interesting, and Atom Smasher who is fun and funny and tries oh so hard.
Black Adam was such an easy launching pad for this anti-hero, more of the Justice Society, a future entry into a Shazam movie, a Supeman V Black Adam film, and another look at some of the twists introduced.
GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOL 3
The finale to this version of the Guardians was written and directed by James Gunn, who also did the previous two, and runs for two hours and twenty-nine minutes. It cost $250 million to make and made $845 million, making it a hit. It has a Rotten Tomatoes score of 82%, which means a majority of critics thought it was really good.
Meanwhile, for me, this a colossal bore. It is not interesting, nor funny, or exciting, and lacks emotion.
Some will say the Rocket Raccoon part is sad and tragic then empowering, but really is just manipulative and annoying. Gunn’s daring message is be kind to animals and don’t do testing on them. Thanks for the obvious moral lesson.
And speaking of moral lessons, we get a questionable action from Mantis that is never addressed, and Star Lord becomes a jerk to Gamora because, despite being all over space, he does not understand anything about time and dimensions and whatnot.
The only reason I completed this one is because I am a Geek completist.
SECRET INVASION
When Marvel Comics first announced Secret Invasion years back, I thought it was a brilliant organic concept and that writer Brian Micheal Bendis was executing it perfectly. When the actual crossover event started, I loved it and could not wait for each issue. Then, about halfway through, it all seemed to fall apart, and by the finale it was rather boring. Methinks they had a great idea with no ending, kinda like Final Crisis for DC.
So when Marvel Disney announced a Secret Invasion streaming show, I had high hopes, figuring they had learned from the mistakes of the comic, eventhrough we all knew they probably could not include all the characters and action set pieces because of the huge expense.
What we get is a very uneven thriller of six one hour episodes that should have been three one hour episodes. And a very weak reason as to why Fury has not called in his friends The Avengers. Plus one of the endings makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. Along the way, one of Fury’s SHIELD secrets gets revealed and it is supposed to be a shocker but instead it makes no logic either. A political point is tried at the end, and while effectively shown, it is a swipe from Supergirl years ago.
The interesting bits are very good however. Olivia Colman is awesome in everything and that very much includes here. Getting updates on some parts of the Marvel Universe is nice. Fury showing a different emotional side, and experiencing PTSD from The Snap and The Blip was interesting. The introduction of a new anti hero is well done and with a good reason for being.
Which brings up one of the main themes of Secret Invasion, that of how government and society treat immigrants and refugees, just like the Dr Who two-parter with Peter Capaldi that was absolutely amazing. Almost none of the bad things would happen here if promises were fulfilled, promises that governments were well equipped to handle, and a smidgen of humanity had been shown. The reason implied as to what went wrong is, to put it mildly, stupid and makes no sense. If it is supposed to make a political statement or metaphor, then I missed it. But I am happy this was brought up, and maybe this is a teachable moment.
OBI WAN
Long planned and finally here, we get the Obi-Wan streaming show, telling a six episode story filling in some gaps in a favourite Star Wars character. Actually, it fills in the gaps of several Star Wars characters, which is a good thing. And a good mission for these shows.
Three different lives are explored at the same time, all connected by past histories, as Obi Wan deals with PTSD and guilt, Luke lives a happy poor life as a carefree child with dreams of something more, and Leia is disgruntled at her pampered life and not made fully happy by her caring parents. Violently and deceptively manipulating into this situation is a new character who upturns everything multiple times.
To say I loved this is an understatement. Tons of dangling plot ideas and interesting concepts and tidying up story holes are expertly stitched together here in a tale fuelled by revenge. And part of that leads to a massively important turning point in Star Wars, which gives us a major look at a major character.
Oh, and we get lots of great action set pieces as well, a Star Wars staple. This series was extremely well paced and I cannot see how it could have translated into a movie instead. And Obi Wan fits in perfectly between Chapters III and Chapters IV of the Saga.
Well, that’s a wrap on my thousands of Geek thoughts trampling out of my mind. Hope some of this made sense, and maybe some of this made you want to catch up as well.
Scoopriches
… is reading The Pain And The Great One Series by Judy Blume. Got this thanks to @torontolibrary
For those following along with my Twitter (I mean X or whatever it is this week), and/or Instagram, and/or Facebook (or Meta or whatever it is this week), and/or LinkedIn, and/or Goodreads (or…. Oh you get the idea) know that my ongoing #fridayreads this summer has been another special project.
Namely, reading everything the legendary Judy Blume has ever published.
I started years back with the famous Are You There God? It’s Me Margaret, and continued with Blubber and Iggie’s House, which led to the Fudge Series. I vowed to go back someday and finish everything she has ever written, because we bookies are an obsessive idiotic reading project oriented lot.
So in June, I started what I called Blumeing Summer! and regularly trodded off to the library and picked up all sorts of her books.
Recently I started The Pain And The Great One Series, an earlier set of books aimed at a slightly younger reader then Margaret.
Which brings me to the postcard mentioned in the title.
While reading away the continuing adventures of The Pain And The Great One, something popped out. It was a piece of paper with a treasure map scrawled on it, leading to unspeakable greatness!
No, actually, it was a postcard.
It was written by a child to their friend here in Toronto. The postmark showed it was only a few months old, and the cost of the stamps on it backed that up. So no, this was not an artifact to put on Ancestry hoping to find some grandmother type from yesteryear who sent this when she was a wee little one. But that would have been fun and interesting as well.
What to do with it was fairly obvious. Someone was missing a postcard from their friend, a valuable loved memento, sure to be treasured for generations to come.
So Googliebear and I mailed the postcard back. We included a note that we found this in a library book.
Very soon, in a different part of our fair metropolis, an envelope will be arriving, and a postcard will live inside. And happiness will ensue forever. Or maybe for five minutes.
But they will also have a great story to tell, thanks to our mutual love of Judy Blume.
Scoopriches
… is reading The Pain And The Great One Series by Judy Blume. Got this thanks to @torontolibrary
**Just to warn you, this is a long read. I’ve tried to write it numerous times, but not quite been able to. Even now, it’s difficult. TW I didn’t get IRL: drug use, OD, death. (Sorry for the spoilers.) My goal in writing this was to share the experience and lessons so you might end up with the same good outcome, without the unexpected trauma. The main take away: take a look around, not just the subway, but wherever you are. Check that the “sleeping” person really is sleeping — you don’t have to wake them up, just that they seem to be breathing normally. Beyond that, carry and learn how to use Naloxone. In Ontario, you can get it online or even pharmacies. Learn the signs of an opioid overdose. Learn First Aid and CPR. In a way, I’m thankful to John Doe, because he taught me some important lessons. I think of him fondly, like a friend I happened to meet after death. I am not sorry it ‘happened’ to me; I’m relieved I noticed. Thank you again to those who offered understanding or advice during that time. **
Exactly three months ago, on Wednesday, April 6, 2022, at approximately 8:30 pm, I was on my way home from work. It was later than usual because that day, my coworker and I smoked a little weed before heading home. I was feeling very floaty, but my plan was just to watch some bad movie on my phone on my commute home and relax.
I changed trains at St George, heading west. There weren’t many seats, so I went to lean against the empty ttc booth at the end of the train. There are two pairs of seats in that area, with a plastic partition in front of the first set separating it from the doors. As I walked on, I noticed a man sleeping in the first set, head down so all you could really see was his back. A young couple sat behind him.
Just as I was about to hit play on that bad movie, I had a thought. Well, the truth is, I’m not sure it was really my thought. It was in my head and in my voice, but it shocked me because it came out of nowhere, and it was frustrated, angry, hurt. It was “are you really just gonna watch something while someone is dead/dying in front of you??” And I thought back “wait, WHAT? IS he okay??”
I put my phone and earphones in my pocket and went to the man’s side. I tried tapping beside him and calling out “hey hey are you okay”. Nothing. I put my hand on his back. You’re not really supposed to do that with first aid. I probably only touched him for a fraction of a second, but it was enough. He was so unnaturally hard, stiff, solid, that I knew something was very wrong.
I pulled my hand away and announced “I don’t think this man is alive”.
The couple behind him assured me he was probably fine, just sleeping. I asked how long he’d been like that, and they said since they’d gotten on a couple stops earlier. He hadn’t moved? I asked. No, they said. I thought right, because he’s dead. But then I thought, okay, maybe they are right. Maybe I’m just freaking out because I’m still high. So to convince all of us, I tried again. I banged on the plastic partition in front of him, close to his head. Hard. And called out to him loudly. I really wanted to be wrong. Nothing.
Finally people took notice and kind of gathered, but no one moved. I kept asking people to pull the emergency alarm, with increasing desperation, but no one would. I couldn’t reach one myself. Someone told me I should walk through the train to the first car to bring the driver back. I knew that was a terrible idea but I couldn’t manage to explain why other than saying “you’re not supposed to walk through there. Just pull the alarm!”
Someone came over and asked if everything was okay or something to that effect and I said, no, I don’t think he’s okay. But everyone just kind of looked at him. I guess we were all in shock or denial, really. Finally someone pointed out a small emergency alarm behind me I hadn’t realized was there, but someone else suggested I wait until we reached the next station. So we waited a few heavy seconds until Bathurst and then I pulled the alarm.
Although this felt excruciatingly long and slow, and I was actually angry that it took so long to get anyone to help, I realized later that this all happened, literally, in less than 2 minutes.
I think once the alarm was sounded, that’s when people really started coming over, including this man who said he used to work for a shelter. At some point, I took out the Naloxone I had in my bag, but couldn’t figure out how to open it. (I found out later, you don’t open it. The kind I had (nasal spray) is ready to go.) I thought I am not sober enough to do this myself so I kept trying to give it to people but they didn’t understand. Someone said we couldn’t use it because we didn’t know what he took and again I couldn’t fully explain through the haze that we could, that it would only have an effect if he had taken an opioid. If he hadn’t, it would not have any effect, but also not cause any harm.
With the help of others, the man who’d worked at a shelter lifted him up and I saw his face briefly. His lips were blue, his face not a lively shade. His body stayed basically in the same position as he’d been sitting. I thought, he is dead, he is dead, he is dead. I assumed rigor mortis had set in. It all felt very surreal.
A man who said he’d had law enforcement experience asked if anyone had gloves and I gave him ones I had in my kit. A girl called 911 and I heard her yell “what train are we on? WHAT TRAIN ARE WE ON?” I yelled out the train number and heard her repeat it on the phone. I wish I could remember those numbers now, so I’d know when I was on that same subway car, but I can’t.
They tried to do CPR on him. The shelter worker asked if anyone knew how to do it to help him, and I did, but again was not in a great state to do it. I was thankful when the guy sitting behind him stepped up. I later found out, the jaw wouldn’t open properly. It, too, was too stiff. A doctor appeared and offered to help. I thought “wow, a doctor on the ttc… I thought that only happened on airplanes”. I gave him the Naloxone and thankfully he took it and finally administered it.
In the middle of everything, this young guy’s hand came through the crowd holding a phone. He was taking photos/video and many people yelled at him to stop. He faded away into the crowd.
TTC, Police, and paramedics all attended, in that order, I think. I remember the paramedics coming in like heroes in a movie, striding with purpose. It was amazing to behold. They administered the second dose of Naloxone I offered and continued CPR for a long time.
The police cleared the train of civilians but I was behind the paramedics, kind of stuck, so I didn’t move. An officer took me aside to take my statement. I’m not sure how much sense I made. I remember him telling me I should contact Victim Services but I said what I really needed was to get an update/information after. He said that would not be possible. They wouldn’t be able to tell me anything. I told him about my friends’ cousin, Darren McKim, who had died in hospital after a fire at the tent he’d been staying at under the Mt Pleasant Bridge. Because he hadn’t been identified when he could have been, he died alone. I told him this haunted his (adoptive) mother and family. I know a lot about the story because I’m working on a book about it, and I felt a responsibility in that moment not to let something like that happen again. I pleaded with the officer to do everything he could to identify this man and contact his family as soon as possible because he mattered. I think he said he would.
I pointed out the couple who had been sitting behind me and the police officer went to speak to them.
A ttc guy asked if i was okay. I said yes. He said, “are you sure? Your eyes….” and I wondered what my eyes looked like. Was it because of the weed or because of the shock and tragedy? Another ttc guy took my name and told me I could leave to avoid being retraumatized. I said too late, that was done when I put my hand on his back. He nodded and let me stay, watching them try to bring him back.
The guy with law enforcement experience asked how we were supposed to get home now. He asked what I was going to do. I had forgotten where I was going, or that the subway wouldn’t be running, or that I had anywhere to go at all. I told him that was the least of my concerns. He nodded and wandered away. I spoke to a few other people there briefly–the doctor, the man who’d worked at the shelter, and after they took the man away, still doing compressions, the young couple who’d been sitting behind him and I left too. The whole way, we talked about homelessness and overdoses and how next time, they would check if they saw someone sleeping. They kept asking how I knew…. I didn’t tell them about my “thought”.
I remember my hand felt strange and foreign for hours after, like it no longer was totally mine. It had touched death and I thought maybe it would always just feel a little off.
When I finally came out of my home station, I called my mom to tell her what had just happened, but before I could, an unhoused man I’d often seen around the station came and sat down. He had dried blood all around his face. I asked him if he was okay and he said no. I asked if he wanted medical care, and he said no. I noted he seemed okay, except for the blood, and it was not fresh. He told me he would probably be dead within the year, and he hadn’t eaten well in a few days and all he wanted was a few burgers. I thought, I couldn’t help that other man, but I can help him in this small way. We went to buy some burgers. I was grateful to him in that moment because my immediate concern for him grounded me in a way nothing else had. By the way, if you recently gave me clothing or money, it was to help this guy out. He said to tell everyone thank you. I later got him a sleeping bag and tent, clothing, and medical supplies.
The next morning, on my way to work, I saw an unhoused man sleeping on the TTC. I froze, rooted to my seat. I kept telling myself to go check on him, but I couldn’t move. I kept thinking not again, not again, it couldn’t happen again so soon, what are the chances, but still, I couldn’t move. Eventually, I pried myself from the seat to check and he was just sleeping, but my hands were shaking and I teared up.
On my way home, something amazing happened. I realized I had boarded the train on the same end of the subway car, and I couldn’t help but stare at That Seat. This woman standing beside me said, “you were there last night, right”. Turns out she’d been standing beside me then too. She’d help lift him out of his seat. She said she noticed something was wrong because he hadn’t moved with the train normally. She said she’d probably never be able to sit in that seat again. We both stared in horror at the seat… until the guy sitting in it moved to another. She told me she’d seen the paramedics continue to work on the man even as they took him into the ambulance, and that they’d only do that if they saw some sign of life. She thought he may have survived, though likely in bad condition. She asked about him at the hospital she worked at, and they said they hadn’t admitted him, but maybe one of the other ones nearby had. She gave me her instagram so we could share info– but I didn’t save it properly and lost it. I posted a brief version on a Facebook group in the hopes of finding her, but we were never reunited. I never saw her again. But someone in the group I posted in happened to go to the same dog park as the TTC supervisor, and he had told her that the man had been 25 years old and had not survived. She said he seemed sad about it and that it happened frequently.
I thought for a minute that was enough information to satiate me, but it wasn’t. I went to Bathurst Station and spoke to the ttc worker. He said he hadn’t been working, but his buddy had. And that right before this incident, a woman had jumped in front of the train. (And in fact this was useful info because when I called the police for contact info of the officer I’d spoken to, they initially gave me the info for the first death. Luckily, I remembered the officer’s name.) Every day, I searched online and read hundreds of pages of obituaries and death notices, hoping to confirm that he had been identified and that his loved ones knew. I actually reached out to friends of two of them, and found another man, just 27 years old, who had died on the same day of an overdose in Toronto, in a shelter washroom. I’d reached out to someone I knew at Sanctuary, Lorraine Lam, and she put me in contact with Doug Hatlem, who works with the Homeless Memorial. Both were very supportive and informative. Doug included both men on the Memorial as John Doe, and spoke about their stories. And I called the police to try to get answers they told me they wouldn’t give.
The first officer I spoke to on the phone, at the station, spoke of privacy concerns. She asked, if I’d collapsed on the subway, would I want her to give out information to someone who called to inquire? I said absolutely, especially if I didn’t survive and was unhoused and maybe unidentified. I’d definitely want someone to know. She said, “well… that’s not how privacy laws work”. But why not? Who do they really protect in cases like this? How many traumatized people are out there, wondering about strangers they tried to help and not knowing if they survived or not? (I spoke to someone whose daughter helped a woman who’d been hit by a car, held her hand until the ambulance came, and was tortured that years later she didn’t know if she had lived or not.) Does it help the unhoused people who can slip so easily through the cracks and not be counted? And anyway, how does knowing IF he was identified, or IF his family was contacted affect his privacy? She told me the officer on scene would be working the following week. Maybe he would tell me more. This was of course the one who told me they would not be able to tell me anything. When I called back that day, I was told he was on the road. But that officer offered me his email address. I sent a short email asking for a phone call.
Nine days after the incident, I think it was around 11 PM, I got a call from him. I told him I hoped I had given him the information he needed that day. He assured me I had. I said, good, so now I need you to give me some. He hung up to talk it over with his supervisor, and then called me back. He had permission! He told me the man had not survived, that paramedics had tried for an hour to resuscitate him, but were unable to do so, and that he had personally stayed with him all that time. He told me the man had been identified, and that his family had been notified. I asked him to make a note that if the family wanted to talk to me as someone who had tried to help him, they could have my contact info — only if they wanted, not for my benefit. He said they probably wouldn’t reach out, and they haven’t. And he confirmed the man had indeed been unhoused. He added that he’d had a good impression of me that day, which was a surprise but very good to hear. I thanked him for telling me, wished him well, hung up, and had a good cry. Nine days later, I could finally stop obsessively searching the obituaries and death notices.
But, I still was carrying the trauma of that night. Every time I got on the subway and saw someone unhoused sleeping, my heart would race, my throat would instantly be dry and closed, and once I was sure they were okay, I’d be a mess, shaking and blinking back tears. I ride the subway multiple times a day, and sadly there are a lot of unhoused people sleeping there because the shelters are full and real housing is next to impossible to get. People said they hoped it wouldn’t happen again, but that wasn’t comforting, because it easily could happen again. That was out of my hands.
But something Lorraine said helped me realize that I couldn’t go back to how it was before–as just a means to and end, doing my best to disappear into my phone–but I could have a new relationship with it, one I could choose. I realized I wanted to get rid of the trauma response, but keep the awareness.
This is a whole other post, really, but I did my own version of therapy. I approached it like a scientist and experimented with how I reacted, observed my feelings and physical responses without judgement, until they faded away. Now, three months later, I’ve pretty well recovered. (Except for one thing, “The Seat”. I sat in it once and fought a panic attack, and I haven’t pushed that one since.)
I did more training with the Naloxone, thanks to Jordan from LAMP’s harm reduction team, and went out with them to search for used needles. Now I carry the injection version of Naloxone and I’m more confident in approaching people and knowing when to use it.
Now, when I get on the subway, I always look around to see if anyone is in need of help. I don’t wait for a mysterious thought to warn me. I check anyone who looks vulnerable and sleeping, but I do it not with panic, but with purpose.
Just yesterday, as the doors opened, I saw someone sleeping, nearly exactly the same way as the man I found. He was folded in half at the waist, his head resting on a small box of sweets, as though it were a pillow.
Without hesitation, I went up to him and said “hey man, are you okay?”
His head shot up and he muttered “Yeah. Thank you”.
I said, “okay, thanks” and sat across from him. I’d learned if they are okay enough to say they’re okay, they probably are. I mentally went through the steps I’d need to take to give him Naloxone if needed, just in case. People around him moved away. I watched his chest rising. It’s hard to count breaths on a moving vehicle, especially when they’re wearing a jacket, but I thought it might have slowed. I learned that opioid overdoses are like that–their breathing slows until it stops. So I went up to him again, and touched his shoulder as I asked, “are you still okay?”
And he answered “yeah, thanks”.
But I thought since he was answering me, I should ask just in case: did you take an opioid? He said no, but he looked very rough. He had marks on his arm and something in his hand. He told me he’d been staying awake to protect his friend from being raped, so he was tired. I said he sounded like a good friend and sorry to keep waking him up.
“That’s okay, this is my stop” he said, gathering his sweets.
“I was just worried,” I said, “because I found someone who OD’d.”
“Me too,” he said, “my best friend.”
I told him I was sorry for his loss, and wished him and his friend well as he left the subway. And you know what, my hands barely shook. And I finally finished writing this story. So l’ll end with a plea to look around, don’t avoid people society tells you to ignore. If you check on them knowing the answer might be that they’re not okay, maybe you’ll avoid the shock and trauma of finding out the hard way. Learn CPR and first aid. Carry (and know how to use) Naloxone. If you can, give the police report so you can follow up after. And do follow up, even if they discourage it. If you’ve read all this, thank you, and if it had an effect on even one other person to look around and check on folks and not wait for a mysterious “thought” from beyond, then it was worth it.
Natalia is a graduate of Humber College’s TV Writing and Producing program. She loves TV, movies, comics, and webseries – and aims to write for them all. Natalia lives in Toronto, Canada and on Twitter @Taliana83.
Scoop here. This was originally posted on Natalia’s Facebook last year, than reposted recently on twitter. With an election for a new Mayor of our city of Toronto going on, I felt this was an important issue Natalia was discussing, homelessness and addiction, that should be addressed. Our previous Mayor was an ineffectual dud who did nothing for this city and treated the less fortunate very badly. We can, we have to, do better.
Last weeks episode 6 of Star Trek Picard aired, and just like the previous five weekly adventures, it was excellent. In fact, more excellent then the one before, just like all the rest this season.
When this season started, I gave my predictions for the show, and I somehow, miraculously for me, got one right! So now I will take my chances with another three daring thoughts of the shape of things to come with Gene Roddenberry’s creations. And of course SPOILERS if you are not caught up.
MUSEUM SHIPS!
We have seen all sorts of ships at the museum, from Kirk’s Enterprise-A to Sisko’s Defiant II to Janeway’s Voyager to Archer’s Enterprise to whole host of other Federation and non-Federation ships. Which leads to my theory, which has also been guessed at by masses online, that because the whole current fleet is all connected, the great big final boss battle will be between the newer ships versus the older ships. It will be epic and mindblowing and will have every Geek exploding all over the place. It would be bigger then the end of The Day Of The Doctor or The Avengers Assembling. And now, to add even more greatness to the greatness, the flagship of this great battle will be the Enterprise D! Yes, the famous ship from The Next Generation series that Picard commanded! But it was pretty much destroyed in the movie Generations, but Geordi and his daughter mentioned something in hanger bay 12 at the museum, and like most of the internet, I have guessed it is the D. Sigh. I know it sounds all very fanficy, but man that would be AWESOME!!!
THE EVIL PLOT!!
The Changelings plan seemed to all involve with getting their clutches on Picard’s body, which was stored in The Daystrom Institute after Picard’s essence was transferred into a new artificial body. But after getting his corpse, the Changelings suddenly seem to lose interest and started chasing his secret son Jack. The son who inherited Picard’s Irumodic Syndrome, that causes hallucinations. And remember in episode 6 they also stated all the current ships are networked together. So what if the Changelings want to extract the syndrome from Picard’s lifeless body, then duplicate it, then transmit the recipe for it to all the connected ships and they replicate out into the air. All those crews hallucinating and firing on each other and destroying each other, internally and externally. The entire Starfleet gone. The Federation defenseless. And the now meatier Changelings have their revenge and can take over. Then they can take our resources to fight their true enemy, the one that hunted them centuries ago, The Borg.
KIRK CLONE!!!
As seen at Daystrom, they have Kirk’s body in storage, and he is listed as having died in Generations. That’s not a surprise, but just a confirmation of something I am pretty sure we guessed already, that the Shatnerverse novels where Kirk came back are not cannon just like the other books. That sucks because I liked them, but also par for the course. Anyway, Kirk’s remain were saved by something called Project Phoenix, a name that feeds into where I am pretty sure we were all going anyway with this corpse idea. They are trying to clone Kirk. Which will also lead them to clone Spock and McCoy and Scotty and Uhura and Sulu and Checkov. Now Starfleet can have its greatest crew boldly going to explore strange new worlds again in a Constitution style modern ship like the Titan, but of course called Enterprise-F. Hence we have a new Star Trek show filled with the clones of our favs and in a cool new ship. Star Trek Legacy is a name bouncing around for a Titan series, but it really fits so much better here. And this show can do sequels to classic episodes. My fanfic head is exploding over this one!
So what do you think? Is Cadet Scoop a genius or completely off his phaser? The next few weeks will reveal all!!!
Scoopriches
… is reading The Land by Mildred D. Taylor. The sequel to the Logan Family story. Got this thanks to @torontolibrary
And I haven’t mentioned it here for quite some time, probably years. So I recently figured, why not do some shameless self promotion?
So yes, I did write a book once.
The Passport To The Wall is a middle grade fiction novel, made up of 52 plus 1 short chapters, sometimes as multiparters, that were serialized for a year here on my blog Scoops Mental Propaganda. And to make it even more fun, several short stories by me are also on the blog, and they all tie into Passport in some way or another. Because interconnectiveness is awesome, and a pain.
So what is The Passport To The Wall about?
This is the story of Ilona, a shy eleven year old grade 5 girl, who uses a popular book to make desperately needed new friends. Ilona sees a group of girls, who at recess and lunch, read this extremely popular children’s book, one that everyone jokingly refers to as “the book with the man with the trident on the cover”. After begging her parents, who are on a limited income, for the book, she gets it and gathers the courage to meet these girls.
This begins five new friendships that alter almost everything about Ilona. They trust her with their secrets and she helps protect them when the world turns against them. During the course of the school year, more friends come and go from her life, for all sorts of reasons, and Ilona evolves into a better person every step of the way. She learns how to be a friend, finds out more about the world, and helps her family heal. The cast at the beginning is different from the cast at the end, and she adapts to it all.
Passport brings up a huge variety of issues that Ilona and the other characters confront, including mental health, healing from trauma, LGBTQ equality, racism, what is justice, income inequality, self esteem, bullying, and forgiveness, to name just a handful or two. Some are never fully answered, or answered at all. For instance, towards the end, Ilona has a huge unresolved argument with her parents about money and how she should be more involved with decisions. This raises the question of how much children should engage in adult concerns. And earlier in the novel, Ilona witnesses an injustice done to one of her new friends, and becomes a part of the retribution. How far do you go for a friend? And what is justice? These and other conversations are great starting points for kids and parents to discuss and learn from.
One of the reasons I came up with Passport was to explore these thoughts and more. I hope people are entertained and enlightened and enriched by my tale. If so, please drop me a comment or two.
Scoopriches
… is reading All The Days Past, All The Days To Come by Mildred D. Taylor. The finale to the Logan Family story. Got this thanks to @torontolibrary
Ever since I was a wee little Geek, I have been a film fan, watching old movie classics especially. Seeing them as cinema, but also in historical and social context. With this in mind, over the years, I have come to love, say, Akira Kurosawa’s Seven Samurai, and tolerate John Burges The Magnificent Seven but also love Sturges The Great Escape and am just okay with Kurosawa’s Rashamon.
Now while I don’t like being critical, or even massively critical, on here these days, I recently watched three classics on Tubi, movies that I am sure can withstand my dislike. And warning for mature content.
Last Tango in Paris
In 1972 movie legend Marlon Brando starred in this subtitled art film about a man and woman who anonymously meet in this apartment in Paris just to hang out and have sex and talk. We see what their lives are apart from each other, but not till towards the end do they share who they are with each other. Last Tango is controversial for nudity, but is really controversial for the butter scene. Now this film is boring and stupid and has a very dumb never ending ending with a finalle that had me rolling my eyes. But the real elephant in the room is of course the mentioned butter part, which was the directors idea. It is repulsive and vile and completely rapey and the director is disgusting for doing this. I hated Last Tango before seeing the scene, and it just intensified even more after it.
The Pink Panther
In 1963 director Blake Edwards, who I have always been so so with, did this crime comedy with Peter Sellers, who I have also always been so so with, and several other stars. An international thief is after the famous Pink Panther ring owned by a Princess, and puts his complicated plan into motion at a ski resort. But Sellers bumbling Inspector Clouseau is their to try and stop him. Now this setup is supposed to be funny, and the twist ending that makes no sense is supposed to be very funny, but none of it is. Even when the iconic Pink Panther theme by Henry Mancini plays, it is not interesting. This thing was a hit and spawned multiple sequels through the 60′ and 70’s featuring Inspector Clouseau, only once not played by Sellers, and even inserted the character into a story he was never a part of. Success made the producers release a film after Sellers died that was extra footage, then tried a relaunch with Clouseau’s son, and eventually a complete reboot with Steve Martin. Plus, a famous cartoon series that I never cared for. Obviously their is an audience for this humour, and it is not me. I might try the second film in the series, A Shot In The Dark (where they inserted Clouseau in) just because It is a supposed to be the best of the series, and a good film by itself.
Capricorn One
In 1978 and stupid conspiracy theories that we never went to the moon have gained enough traction that a movie is made based on them. NASA is about to launch a manned mission to Mars, and lots of political muttering is going on. The astronauts are suddenly and secretly pulled out and taken to a secret location. Turns out, the mission was not going to work, so the government is faking it with sets and cameras. The astronauts reluctantly go along, then escape, meanwhile a loser reporter figures it out and is targeted. This movie, like the theories that propel it, are laughingly bad. The escape is far too easy, the rampaging car scene is just awful, the clue on television is a joke, and the last chase sequence just goes on and on. The only remotely interesting part is when the politicians babble politics to each other, and those are scattered throughout as they try to make the story not a cheesy chase, but some kind of parallel to Watergate.
While these three may have struck out with me, I still plan to continue devouring old films and hopefully will enjoy and ponder. Thanks to Tubi and Disney Plus, I will definitely have a ready supply.
Scoopriches
… is reading All The Days Past, All The Days To Come by Mildred D. Taylor. The finale to the Logan Family story. Got this thanks to @torontolibrary
Ever since I was a wee little tot, I have been a Star Trek fan, and even have the honour of having seen Star Trek The Motion Picture in the theatre when it came out. My fervent fandom only increased exponentially when Star Trek The Next Generation was announced, leading me to read every article, watch every news clip, before during and after the premiere. So my lifelong love continued and grew with each new episode, each new series, each new movie, each comic, each new book, and each new toy. My interest in Gene Roddenberry’s creation waned abit in my late 20’s, but that was financial.
While not always happy with the results, each iteration had a closure of some sort. And like many fans, I always felt The Next Generation had so many unresolved bits and pieces. So with Star Trek Picard, we got to see a start of an end, and now with the upcoming season three, we get more of an end of an end.
With this, my long winded (shocker!) babbling is done, and you get to see my predictions of what Star Trek Picard will entail. And with absolutely no inside information, whatever I get right will be a complete shocker.
Jack Crusher Junior?
Picard and Crusher’s Son!
No, not Wesley! That fan theory has been around since the first episode, Encounter At Farpoint. And I have never put any stock into it. But what if Crusher and Picard, after the movie Nemesis, got together and finally set their phasers on stun (or some other euphemism). Then when Picard sulked into retirement at the villa, Crusher decided to raise the child without him, and never told him. This sounds mean, but let’s face it, Picard at the beginning of Picard was a very grumpy defeated bugger, and who would want to be around that, or raise a child around that? And by the way, bonus warp points if the son is named Jack.
Jack Crusher Junior??
The Kids Are Alright!!
We saw Wesley make a comeback as a Time Lord, er, Traveler, at the end of Picard season two, which was awesome and fun and fit so well (and maybe fits in with the Wesley deleted scene from Nemesis), plus the added bonus of finding out what Gary Seven might be (I took that scene as meaning Gary was an agent of the Travellers). Now imagine if Wesley arrives and announces this whole adventure of Picard season three was two fold. One, to save his half brother Jack so that he could become Gary Seven, and two is that the big bad is actually the daughter of Sela (yes Sela, the half Romulan daughter of the alternate timeline Tasha Yar. Now read that sentence five times very fast.). Now to add to the craziness, Wesley gathers up a squad to help him help the Enterprise D crew, and they include Alexander (Worf’s son), Geordie’s two daughters, Lal (Data’s back from the dead daughter), and Kestra (Riker and Troi’s daughter). And along the way Tasha’s sister Ishara comes along as well, having reformed long ago and become a Starfleet officer. The squeal of joy emitting from me if they did this would be massive, and I am sure the rest of fandom would join right in.
Not Jack Crusher Junior!!!
Holograms!!!
I am betting all of Quark’s Latinum that the entirety of the Titan spaceship in which this story seems to take place on, is equipped with holo emitters. And the big bad has set them loose, all to cause havoc for our fearless heroes. So Lore and Moriarty we know will show up, but what about a certain EMH now programmed to be evil, or an aged Admiral Sulu running around with a sword, then Minuet shows up to distract Riker who also has to deal with his dastardly double Thomas, Plus, we would all love to see Picard face off against Dixon Hill. With this you get fan service and real threats and don’t have to worry about continuity one little bit. Talk about a win win. And they could say the holograms are even more dangerous because they can sorta read minds abit since the technology was taken from that asteroid Riker found little Jean Luc on (no, that is not a dirty joke, but the episode Future Imperfect).
So will my predictions become true gospel? Or am I completely stuck in the Delta Quadrant? Judging by my past lack of achievement in forecasting, I am pretty sure I am now a citizen of Delta.
Scoopriches
…is reading All The Days Past, All The Days To Come by Mildred D. Taylor. The finale to the Logan Family story. Got this thanks to @torontolibrary
scoopsmentalpropaganda 